Cut Your Guest List

Cut Down on Your Guest List

By Sara Doerrier

October 12, 2011

When it comes time to sit down with your partner and compile your guest list, the idea of cutting guests from the list may break your heart. In a perfect world we would be able to invite everyone with no extra costs, but, sadly, many of us are on a budget and we need to make tough decisions. And of course, you don’t want to offend anyone in the process of elimination. Here are a few helpful tips to spare some feelings as you finalize the details of your guest list.

You’re engaged! Do they know?

Have they called/emailed/texted you to say congratulations? People who don’t know you’re engaged can’t be too offended if you don’t send them a wedding invitation. However, don’t count on this with older relatives and friends, they may have not gotten the memo quickly enough, but still deserve an invite.

Have they ever met your partner?

If you have been together for a while and your friends still don’t know his name, it’s safe to say they can be left off the list. Childhood friends that don’t care to meet him can be left off. However, if you live far away or your relationship is relatively new (less than a year), this is not the best gauge.

How often do you see them?

If you live in the same metro area or they are a car ride away, and you haven’t seen them in over a year – with no upcoming plans – you can safely cross them off. If you happen to live a good distance away though, this of course is factored in. In this case, you can judge by how often you talk to them…

How often do talk to them?

Yes, Facebook, helps us to stay connected but is being Facebook friends, merely enough? Although you may have announced your nuptials though Facebook and/or other social media sites, you are under no obligation to invite all your ‘friends’. In fact, if you are not in touch outside of Facebook, this is a good judge. You can eliminate those college buddies that, you would love to have but, you haven’t really spoken to since post-graduation.

Would you be offended if they didn’t invite you to their wedding?

Childhood friends that you lost touch with, but still think of fondly and remember the days when you both dreamt of getting married in your princess ball gown wedding dresses need a good long think. Are you that thick skinned you could brush off the snub?

Will they be part of you lives forever?

Relatives are harder to eliminate. They will also always be part of the family. But ex neighbors and co-workers, may not keep in touch after the wedding. This may or may not be true – who knows what the future holds, but if you suspect them to dine and dash after the wedding- don’t invite them.